Misfire's Fangirl
by Fields-of-Heather
Summary: Inspired by BDQ's "Cover Me" and set in her universe. Starscream learns the hard way that you never get between a fangirl and her obsession, Misfire.


Disclaimer: I draw all my inspiration for this story from blkdragonqueen's incredible story, "Cover Me." I bow before her mighty Author-ness.

While this does take place in the "Cover Me" universe, this has nothing to do with BDQ's masterpiece and does not fit anywhere within said story. It is simply the ramblings and ravings of a fangirl (Me) with too much time on her hands.

I own nothing but my crazy fangirl. All Transformers belong to Hasbro and the location (the quarry) and all things associated with it belong to BDQ. I make no money from this.

Misfire's Fangirl - Chapter 1

There were many things Hook hated.

Autobots, stupidity, Starscream, fixing injuries cause by Autobots, fixing injuries caused by stupidity, fixing injuries caused by Starscream's big mouth.

But the thing he hated the most were six little words...

"I was minding my own business..."

Whenever one of his fellow Decepticons came to him and uttered those few words, Hook had to suppress his more violet urges. Giving in to said urges would only mean more work, because said hated phrase always meant he was about to spend the next few hours fixing whatever body part was mangled and/or missing.

The day had started out normally... a sure sign that something unpleasant was on the horizon. The rock quarry that functioned as their "base" was alive with activity and sound. The rest of the Constructicons were hard at work building their base... again. Starscream was off to the side, ranting about something or other. Skywarp and Thundercracker were sitting on their afts, watching their trine leader and trying not to laugh at the piece of shrubbery that had somehow wedged itself into Starscream's back armor. The screaming one had yet to notice it, otherwise his shrieks would have doubled in volume. Runabout and Runamuck where off somewhere, probably patrolling the same stretch of road they traveled every patrol. And Misfire was... waving frantically at him from behind a pile of oil barrels.

Resisting the urge to run the other way, Hook walked over to the obviously distressed Seeker, "What is it, Misfire?"

Said Seeker looked around worriedly, ringing his hands, "Well, you see... I was minding my own business..."

Hook stamped down the desire to reach out and strangle the mech before him.

"... just making my usual rounds when... when it... grabbed me!" Misfire moaned.

"What grabbed you?"

Misfire reluctantly stepped out from behind the oil barrels.

"Holy Primus, What The Slag?" Hook's shout might have drawn attention if not for Starscream hitting a new high note during his rant. He's finally noticed the local flora attached to his backplate.

Hook bent down to get a closer look. It took a few moments to process what he was seeing. Clinging to the side of Misfire's lower leg was an adult human female. She appeared to be of average height and weight, with long dark brown hair and she seemed to be "nuzzling" the metal under her face.

Misfire made a sound similar to a sob, "I've tried to get it off but it won't budge!"

Straighting up, Hook seized Misfire's arm, "Come on, I need a closer look."

...........

Misfire's hysterical laughter caught the attention of his fellow Cons. Thundercracker and Skywarp where the first to wander over to Hook's corner of the quarry. The Medbay consisted of a steel shipping crate that acted as a berth and a large wooden crate for storage. Misfire was currently stretched out on the "berth" laughing loudly as Hook made to grab something behind the Seeker's knee.

Sharing a look, TC and Warp moved closer.

"Hold Still!" growled Hook.

"I'm trying!" Misfire gasped.

"Not you, her." snapped Hook. It was then that the pair of Seeker's noticed what Hook was reaching for. He was trying to grab a small human female that was hiding behind Misfire's knee. Every time Hook made to nab her, the human would scuttle to the other side of Misfire's knee, pulling on sensitive wires and making the unfortunate mech laugh again.

Apparently, Misfire had ticklish knees.

..........

It was a wonderful day for a rant.

The sky was overcast and the wind gusty, horrible weather for flying. The Constructicons were moving slightly faster then frozen Energon. His trine mates were snickering about whatever it was that was stuck to his backplates. He couldn't reach it and would either of them help him? No.

And to top it off, Misfire was out of sight. Primus only knows what that little glitch was up to.

So, all in all, it was the perfect day for Starscream to rant to his sparks content.

That is until he noticed he had no audience.

Spinning around, Starscream found that his troops had gathered in Hook's corner, muttering to each other and staring at something. Stomping over, intent on regaining their attention and adding "wasting time" to his list of rant worthy material, he was surprised at the bets being tossed back and forth.

"Three cans says it never comes off"

"Four that Hook has to amputate."

"AMPUTATE!!!"

"Six cans says that thing lays an egg inside him like that facehugger monster in that movie we watched last week."

A pained whimper sounded before...

"Five cans that it eats his spark!"

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

"Will you all shut up, your panicking my patient!" came Hook's shout as Starscream pushed his way threw the crowd.

"What is going on here.... Misfire, I should have known." growled Starscream.

Misfire gulped and stammered, "I... I'm sorry sir, but... but it followed me home." He motioned to the human female now clinging to the top of his thigh.

Starscream exploded, "What the slag is THAT doing here? I send you out to make sure the human scum doesn't find us and you bring one back with you?"

Misfire whimpered and tried to sink into the berth beneath him. As Starscream started getting on a roll with what promised to be a whopper of a rant, no one but Hook noticed what the female human was doing.

She had let go of her death grip on the cowering Seeker's leg and was now crouched on his hip plate. Her eyes were fixed on the Air Commander and said gaze was enough to make Hook take a step back. His movement snapped the other Cons out of their trance and catching sight of what had made the fearsome medic back up, they also backed away slowly.

"... why I keep a malfunctioning glitchhead like you around is a mystery. I should just have you melted down and used to make the bases foundation, you misshapen slag heap!"

*WACK*

Misfire reeled slightly from the strike to his head. He threw up his arms to shield himself as Starscream reached back to strike him again.

*growl*

Before Starscream could process where the menacing sound was coming from, the human was on him. In a move that no normal human could achieve, the female launched herself from Misfire's hip to his chest before leaping at Starscream.

Starscream gave a very un-leaderlike scream as he tripped over his own feet, falling on his aft. Seizing the opportunity, the female scrambled up his chest plate and onto his head.

"AHHHH, Not The Face, Not The Face!"

..........

"You're lucky you know."

Glaring up at the medic with his one good optic, Starscream hissed, "How do you figure that?"

Hook chuckled darkly, "She could have done a lot more then pull your optic out. One should never incite the wrath of a fangirl."

"A what?"

"A fangirl." Hook forced Starscream's head back, so as to get a better look at his damaged optic socket, "I thought that was what she was, but until our illustrious leader slagged her off, I wasn't sure." Starscream glared at Hook's condescending tone.

Standing off to the side, flanked by Thundercracker and Skywarp, Misfire looked down at the human female he held in his hands. She seemed quite content now, her arms wrapped around his wrist, making little purring sounds. So very unlike just a few short minutes ago. "What's a fangirl?"

"A fangirl is one of the most fearsome creatures in the known universe." Hook paused to pick up a different tool, before continuing, "They are strange creatures that develop an intense and often all consuming obsession with something or someone. They are quite protective and territorially, sometimes leading them to bouts of violence when they perceive a threat to the object of their affection. As Starscream learned." Hook chuckled as he reattached the now functioning optic.

The Air Commander remained silent for once, his lip plates set into a hard line.

"Fangirls have even been known to attack other fangirls, usually when the other one tries to lay claim to the object of her obsession." Dropping his tools back into his crate, Hook stepped back, giving Starscream room to get up.

"If they're so dangerous, should we try to get rid of it?" asked Skywarp before taking a couple steps back. He didn't like the way the fangirl was looking at him.

"No, trying to get rid of it is too dangerous. Forcing a fangirl to separate from the object of her love would only provoke her and frankly, I don't need to be putting more of your faces back together." Hook gave a pointed look at Starscream.

Rising to his feet, Starscream glared at first Hook, then Misfire and finally the human female, "Fine, it can stay. Just keep the disgusting little fleshbag away from me." Ignoring the growls coming from said fleshbag, Starscream stalked off.

"So..." said Thundercracker, ignoring the fact that Skywarp was hiding behind him, peeking over his wing at the fangirl who was purring again, "What should we do about... her?"

"Nothing, just don't make any threatening movements or raise your voice to Misfire and we'll all be fine." grumbled Hook.

"Hook... how do you know so much about fangirls?" asked Thundercracker, eyeing the medic up suspiciously.

Hook shuffled his feet, looking anywhere but at the blue Seeker, "Well.. you see.. I've dealt with fangirls a few times before and um... " Spinning on his heel, Hook snapped, "What are you standing around for? This base isn't going to build itself!" Snarling, he stalked towards his fellow Constructicons, who up until now had been watching and listening in.

Thundercracker and Skywarp shared a look, both wondering what their resident medic wasn't saying.

Beside them, Misfire was enthralled with his pet fangirl. He'd quickly discovered that rubbing her back with one of his large fingers made her purr louder. Smiling, he held her closer to his face, "I'm going to call you.... Squishy!"

..........

Tada! That's it for now. There will be one more chapter, hopefully. Pardon any spelling errors, I tried to catch as many as I could.

Oh and... feed a starving author, please review!


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